Tuesday, April 10, 2007

Re: Your Foolishness

Yesterday's post touched a nerve among certain foolish fools. I make no apologies! You will get none from me, Tyme.

But I do demand that you apologize to me. The MD on one wall of my (villainous) study compliments the PhD on the other quite nicely. And yet you had the nerve to not only steal fifty-two of my precious seconds, but also to disparage the degrees that I earned through legitimate study, scholarship, and years of medical school. (note to students: crime does pay... off student loans!)

And yet you, Tyme, have so far displayed no proof that you have either a medical degree or a doctorate in the finer sciences. Can you even prove you graduated from college?

Mark my words, Tyme. Should you choose to pursue this feud, the consequences will be dire. I am not a patient man. Nor am a merciful man. You have been warned. Again.



At 9:49 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

My dear Doctor Polaris.

Please don't take the insane rantings of "Dr." Tyme to heart. Obviously no University would grant any sort of degree to some guy with a clock on his head.

As opposed to a really snazzy-looking helmet.

At 2:22 PM, Blogger Dr. Tyme said...

Good evening gentle readers, the world-renowned Dr. Tyme here. Yesterday in a post at this location Doctor Polaris made the shocking implication that my accreditation is somehow lacking.

Perhaps I came off as a bit cross in my response to this allegation. To you, good citizens, let me assure you that my credentials are above reproach.

To my esteemed colleague Doctor Polaris, whom I may have offended in my comments, please allow me to say that I am sorry.

Sorry you're such a jackass, you Galactus-helmeted buffoon!

Remind me again how your recent encounter with the Freedom Fighters ended. Ah yes, with your humiliating defeat at the hands of a geriatric. Well played, sir!

I warn you again, I am not one with whom you should trifle! And you, sir, are most assuredly trifling! Proceed at your own peril!

And as for you, Sallyp, you have just earned yourself a spot on my List of Doom! Retribution shall be forthcoming.

However, as I am nothing if not gracious, I will allow you the option of taking your own life in the manner of your choosing rather than suffering the mind-crippling horrors of my wrath.

At 11:22 PM, Blogger Toriach said...

*raises hand* Um, er, Doc P? Not to get all rational and stuff but aren't you sorta kinda dead right now? Ya know with the not breathing and not existing on the physical plane and the having been ripped apart by a superhero thing in Infinite Crisis? Not that you won't come back I'm sure.

At 12:34 AM, Blogger Doctor Polaris said...

To Toriach: I am as dead as anyone in comics can be dead. Which means I am not dead at all.

To SallyP: Rest assured, my dear. I will settle this. Soon.

And to the fool Tyme: Fool! You take it a step too far! Certainly, I can suffer the insulting ramblings of a babbling buffoon -- I used to fight Hal Jordan, after all. But I will not -- cannot -- allow you speak to Sally or any of my other readers in such a fashion.

Tremble before my power, Tyme! Your days walking upon the earth as a free man are nearly at their end! Death will be a sweet release for you... But you will not know its embrace for many a long year!

Oh, and you still haven't even said where you got your so-called "doctorate." What am I supposed to believe?

Also: Give me back my fifty-two seconds! I was using those!

At 9:35 AM, Blogger SallyP said...

Hey "Doctor" Tyme! I've just added "Von" in front of my name! That naturally makes me far more evil than you. I don't have any hordes of Doom, I've got something far far more terrible. TEENAGERS!

So bite me.

And Dr. Polaris is just the ginchiest.

At 12:49 PM, Anonymous Matthew said...

Doctor Doom is not a doctor, and he's more evil than both of you put together.

Polaris, Tyme, you suck. Go get therapy from the Joker.


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