Google Me

Lacking as I do a constant medical practice or tenured position at a non-crime university, I am forced to find other ways to occupy my time. When I am not leisurely robbing banks or enjoying fine wine I like to google myself.

I do so enjoy seeing how the rest of the world views me. It is unsurprising that my the very first hit is the Wikipedia entry on me. Those self-editing jabberwocks have done a passable job of describing me.

The second hit -- my DC Database Project profile -- is a folly of colossal proportions. Not only is most of the entry simply culled from my Wikipedia entry, but there are numerous egregious errors.

The entry correctly identifies me as a Professional Criminal, Physician, and Physicist. It credits me with my undergraduate degree and my medical degree, but it shamefully neglects my PhD in physics! Those of you with PhDs know the work that one puts into that. Do I not deserve to be recognized for my accomplishments? The DCU Database Project must comply, or suffer.

My third hit on Google is yet another profile. I am pleased that the masses take such interest in me. But here, again, I am not given the full credit I deserve. This profile does not deign to grant my proper title first billing, listing "Doctor Polaris" as only an alias. Make no mistake: though I am Polaris, you may address me as Doctor.

It is not until the fifth hit that we arrive at this very blog. Those who know more of the workings of the Google: tell me how I might raise my hit ratio! Too many who live are denied the wisdom of Polaris!