Time For A Change
I've been thinking about my life. And I realized that there was only one time when anybody paid attention to me. Only one time when I was respected. I'm talking about when I was a villain.You all remember when I took over as Batman. I grew increasingly paranoid and violent. And I got my face on lots of covers. Sure, I was the bad guy. But I got respect because of it. And you know what? I want some of that back.
So here's what I'm saying, everyone. Know that next time you see me posting here, I'm going to be grim, gritty, and evil. Because it seems that only the villains seem to get respect. And girls. I've seen the women Doctor Polaris hangs around with. I want some of that!
Labels: Azrael
posted by Azrael @ 6:27 AM
8 comments
8 Comments:
So you're Az-Bats again? I didn't realize you were being evil than. I just thought, excuse the pun, Bat-Shit Crazy!
BWAWHAHAHAHA
Oh Azrael, sweetie, I know you are having troubles, but you need to think this through! Dr. Polaris gets away with being a villain because...well because he's AWESOME! And he has really great hair.
Here, have some milk and cookies, and you'll feel better.
I, personally, applaud Azrael's initiative.
I've never told you this before, but when I was in 5th grade we all thought you were the shit and I was so jealous of the kid who had a seemingly endless number of your solo title. I think you should keep being a hero even if you are crazy. When I played with Total Justice action figures back in the day, I totally did so with Legends of the Dark Knight Knightquest Batman (who as you know was you) as a prominent adventurer. So sweet were the days when a Justice League composed of you, Kyle Rayner, Hawkman, Superman, Legends of the Dark Knight Future Batman, Aquaman, and Black Lightning would totally pwn on Despero, Darkseid, Bane, and freakishly large Legends of the Dark Knight Scarecrow. You also alternatively teamed up and did battle in intercompany crossovers with Iron Man and a different colored Iron Man I pretended was War Machine as well as many members of the X-Men. I even pretended that you could fly. The figure was and is so dear to me that I think I can still find its gun and missile after all this time.
For my childhood's sake, you make a better hero than villain. I was very surprised recently when I learned you were dead (I had just assumed you were still kicking, because you were motherfucking Azrael, right?) and I hope that when (and not if) you do return to comics, Mr. Valley, it as a shining example of heroism and a full member of the "Batman family" and the superhero community at-large.
Also this flavor text from the action figure's package may remind of you of your proud heritage:
"Azrael, a strange super hero whose crime-fighting mission was handed down to him by generations of super heroes, has made a name for himself in Gotham City, standing in when Batman is away. He calls himself Knightquest Batman and wears an armored suit with soaring wings on his back. Knightquest Batman puts new fear into the hearts of the underworld."
Villains don't get that kind of press.
I... I don't know what to say. I can't betray your childhood memories. I don't know what I was thinking. I'm going to redouble my violent vigilantism! Where Azrael goes, criminals will fear! I AM AZRAEL!
Oh.. And for what it's worth... Thanks.
So you're a monkey then?
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