Foolery

Today is a day of "foolery." April foolery.

But know this! I, Doctor Polaris will make no effort to deceive you with childish tricks. Rather, I will forthrightly tell you that I will take your money. And I will crush your car with my awesome magnetic powers.

I will not pretend on this, the first day of April that I like Magneto or respect Hal Jordan. I would not insult your intelligence with such paltry parlor tricks. I will make it clear that Magneto is marked for death and that Hal Jordan is a fool every day of the year.

Doctor Polaris is not interested juvenile April foolery. Polaris cares nothing for pranks and tricks. So take your "April Fools" to the other side of the street. Because I am not amused.

This is the Day

I realize now that I was wrong. Marvel Comics are totally the shiz-nit. I mean, Wolverine? He's so cool! I mean, he's got those claws and the facial hair. Plus, he's a ninja! Or something.

And I'm really glad that they killed Captain America. That guy wasn't cool enough. He didn't angst or complain like the totally roxxor X-Men. How roxxor are the X-Men?? Totally!

Also, I want to see more Rob Liefield artwork. Most characters don't have enough unnecessary pouches on unnecessary belts. Totally!